I get asked a lot why I’ve chosen to give my blog the name “Unworthy,” so I’ve decided to do what I do best, and write about it.
I started this blog back in 2012, when I was about to graduate college. My boyfriend of over 2 years had already graduated and moved 5 hours away for a job. It was my last semester and I had completely changed my mind about what I wanted to do with my life. I was a little lost and confused, and I wasn’t sure what to do. (By the way – the boyfriend thing worked out…he moved back and now we’re about to celebrate our 4th wedding anniversary.)
My first post I ever wrote was titled “Unworthy.” I thought that, since it was where I started, it would be a good idea to uphold throughout this blogging journey.
I’ve linked that first post above; it focuses on my faith and my relationship with Christ. At a point in my life where I wasn’t sure what my next step was going to be, I decided to try to find something to be grateful for. The only thing I could land on was my faith and my Savior. I wrote about how unworthy I was of his sacrifice, and how I will never deserve the love of Jesus. Instead of being self-deprecating, the idea left me feeling uplifted, cherished, and loved. I focused on the fact that – in spite of my flaws, my lack of a plan, my fear of what was to come – Jesus loves me and he chose to die for me anyway. He knew who I was before I was conceived. He knew all the mistakes I would make and he chose to die for me anyway.
That is the legacy I want to leave and that is the theme that I want to carry throughout this blog. I want to learn how to love unconditionally and selflessly, the way Christ loves me.
I know that all of my blog posts are not about my faith. I post about books, my job, I use curse words in some of my posts (which my mom always notices and always points out – love you, mom). I want to be real and authentic. I want my readers to recognize that faith does not equal perfection and that love is eternal. I want to convey the idea that it doesn’t matter how different we are as long as we can learn to love each other the way Jesus loves us.
The idea behind “Unworthy” is not that I am not worth anything. It is the complete opposite. My worth is beyond measure, just like yours is. Jesus sacrificed himself for you just like he sacrificed himself for me. Our screwups didn’t matter to him then and they don’t matter to him now. I hope that you read my blog and that in the process of learning a little about me, you learn a little about my Savior – about his love for you. I hope you learn that loving others is the most important thing he has taught us. I hope you see him in me, although please forgive me when you don’t – because I am not perfect.
In our own eyes we are all unworthy of the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross. But he saw us and thought differently. He saw us and believed that we were worth so much more than we ever knew.
You are worthy of the love and sacrifice of the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. Don’t forget that. Even when you find it hard to love yourself, Jesus sees you and loves you.
Thank you for reading, following, and sharing. This entire blogging experience has taught me so much and I am ever grateful to you, my readers.
In His Service,
Rachel Claire Cockrell